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“Nifty Fifty” or Beware the Ides of
March
During the waning hours of March 15th
1996, I was sitting in my brother’s living room in New
Orleans, Louisiana. I had arrived on his doorstep a few
days earlier, in the hopes of quietly ignoring one of those
stereotypical milestones of one’s lifetime, my fortieth
birthday, (My editor’s column in the March/April ‘96
Today’s Caregiver magazine was entitled “Lordy, Lordy, guess
who's forty”). It looked as if my plan was going to be a
success after all, including a nice quiet evening in the
French Quarter (well, as quiet as possible on Bourbon
Street). We were watching the final moments of the spring
telethon for the New Orleans PBS station, which one of my
brother’s friends, Charles, was hosting. As the show ended,
Charles looked into the camera and said “I want to wish my
friend, Gary Barg, visiting from Miami, Florida a happy
fortieth birthday tonight”. Oh well, so much for slipping
quietly into my next decade of life. Now, on the eve of my
50th year, I have no such concerns.
What I feel this year as I look back over
the past decade, is such tremendous gratitude for being able
to spend so much time with my caregiving friends and family
members. I have not had a single conversation with a family
or professional caregiver over these past ten years, in
which I have failed to become more motivated to continue our
supportive mission and have always inevitably come away from
the conversation having learned something of importance that
I can share with my fellow caregivers. As I enter my “nifty
fifties”, I realize that you have already given me the most
valuable gifts I will ever receive. You have shared your
lives with me in your emails, letters and conversations, and
I hope that somehow we have returned the favor with our
unwavering support and love.
So, this year, I would like to celebrate
my birthday, by giving some gifts of my own. Tell me about
those simple things that help you get through the day as you
care for loved ones or clients. It could be how you
maintain a sense of humor, what you do to take, as Dana
Reeve referred to in our interview as, “A Mental Bubble
Bath” or even how you get your family members to help so you
can actually get away for a while. (Hey, I can dream, can’t
I?) We will look over your comments and present an annual
subscription to Today’s Caregiver magazine for the top 50
responses. We will also share the results in this newsletter
later in the month.
I recently spent the weekend at the beach
with a group of friends who are all over 50 and if they are
any indication, I can’t wait for the transformation, for as
I slept in the living room in front of the television, they
partied all night. I told them if they didn’t behave, I was
going to wake their grandkids up to come and take them home.
Now, pass me that Geritol.
Email me your tips:
What
gets you through the day?
Take care
Gary Barg
Editor-in-Chief
gary@caregiver.com
2006 Caregiver Friendly Award Nomination
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Feature
Story |
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Piece By Piece
by Nickolena Kassolis
Alzheimer’s disease came into my life in January of 2001, and at
the time, it seemed like the lesser of two evils. . ..Continued |
Additional Articles::
Caregiver Guilt
By Dorothy Womack
The role of a caregiver at home is usually accompanied by varying degrees
of guilt. This happens regardless of our effectiveness...Continued
Recognizing Depression in Elders
By Jennifer B. Buckley
“Depression in elderly people is a widespread and serious public
health concern,” according to the National Institute of Mental
Health....Continued
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Guest Column |
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The Sandwich Generation
By Kathleen Bogolea, MS
Since the adoption of the National Family Caregiver Support Program in
late 2000, there have been numerous news articles and points of
interests written about the family caregiver and their many different
roles within the family and the community........Continued |
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Caretips |
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Ten Tips
For Ensuring Medication Safety
by Seymour Ehrenpreis and Eli D. Ehrenpreis
People over the age of 65 represent 14% of the US
population but consume more than one-third of prescription medications.....Continued
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F r o m O u r R e a d e r s |
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Carenotes |
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Hi,
I am a caregiver for my boyfriend who has
multiple sclerosis. I was also a nursing
assistant for over 6 and a half years so
when I met him and he told me he had ms I
knew what to do to help him. We've been
together now for almost 2 years. In that
time he has gone from transfers to a hoyer
lift and is unable to do anything for
himself at all. I love him so very much, but
I am having a hard time coping with the
stress. I feel as if I have no time for
myself. I've been under so much stress that
I've been in the hospital with bleeding
ulcers because I find it hard to take care
of myself. I am taking care of him 24-7 and
it's like I have no time for myself. I
sometimes go in the room to watch TV so I
don't have to get up every 5 minutes but I
haven't watched a whole program yet without
interruption.
He says he doesn't control my life but yeah,
he does because he dictates when I go to
bed, when I get up, when we eat, when I can
take a nap because I never sleep a full
night. When I need to take out the trash he
is calling me down the hallway and banging
on the wall because I am not there, he
panics. The point is I am really stressed
out and need some support to keep going. I
know I sound like a complainer, but if
you're not a caregiver you'd never
understand. Even the aids who come into help
don't realize just how much I do. They
always say how tired I look! I would greatly
appreciate any support I could get from
people like you who understand how much we
give up and the actual strength and patience
we have to have in our situations. I am also
willing to help others as helping people
makes me happy too!! As a nursing
assistant I have worked with people with
Alzheimer's, Parkinson's, etc, and also am a
good listener. Does anyone else here have a
loved one with MS?
Thank You,
C
Answer This Week's CareNote:
carenotes/2006/index.htm
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