We just flew in from the left coast after spending a tremendously inspirational day with family caregivers at the 2005 Los Angeles Fearless Caregiver Conference in Carson, California (a city named after Kit, not Johnny). As usual, it was a motivating, educating, tearful, happy and spiritual day. Among the awards presented at the event, was a Fearless Caregiver Award to Ms. Alice Blackman, a family caregiver who still finds time to care for others in need in her community. Many tears flowed when Alice’s daughter stepped onto the stage to surprise her, having flown down from northern California for the presentation during her lunch break, only having to turn around and return to work, later the same day.

I bring Alice to your attention, because in her remarks, she talked about how very important her support group has become to her. At first, she felt forced to go to the support group meeting and sat in the room with her arms crossed and toes tapping, wondering what she was doing, sitting among these strangers who seemed to be whining about their lives. How were they ever going to help her as a caregiver? For some reason, Alice went back a second and third time, and lo and behold, after the third session, she was hooked. Alice now says that she doesn’t know how she was able to cope before discovering the group and mentioned that every member was actually in the audience at the conference to cheer her on. Alice confirmed once again that we had truly found the right person for the award, due to the fearlessness in which she approaches all she does as a caregiver. She instinctively knew that she needed to find this group and that no matter how uncomfortable she felt during the first two visits, she needed to keep going back.

The only problem Alice’s statement presented for me was that I needed to quickly revamp part of the speech which I was to give an hour later, so it wouldn’t seem like I was riding on her coattails. The trouble was that her support group revelation mirrored almost word for word my comments on the same subject. Alice is a living example of what I like to call taking a “Leap of Faith.” Find an appropriate support group and go three times, no matter what you feel about your first two visits. I guess she is living proof that it works.

Fearless Caregiver manifesto
Principle SIX:

I will fearlessly seek out other caregivers or care organizations and join an appropriate support group; I realize that there is strength in numbers and will not isolate myself from those who are also caring for their loved ones.

Hey, don’t just take my word for it, Go Ask Alice.

 

 

Gary Barg
Editor-in-Chief
gary@caregiver.com